Trying to make sense of this crazy world

It’s been an emotionally draining week, given the news coming out of Florida. It all seemed to hit me today. Perhaps it was the slowdown of Friday afternoon. I don’t know. But when my son texted me an hour before school was out – “Mom, can you pick me up today?” – I realized that yes, I could pick him up. I was crazy busy at work and hadn’t planned that brief side trip, but really, my work would go on when I return. It’s the small moments that matter, mostly, and so I picked him up and took him home and we laughed about goofy senseless things in the car. I watched him walk into the house and I swear I could see his entire 14 years flash before me. Wasn’t he just a little baby? Oh my word do these years go by way too fast.

Those moments hanging out in the car are some of my favorite times with Joe. And thank God I have so many of those moments with him. 

Then tonight, we ordered pizza for supper because, well, I didn’t feel like cooking. I was too tired to cook. When the delivery guy showed up, he asked how I was doing. “Fabulous!” I said. “How are you?” And then he told me completely out of the blue, “I heard really good news today – I am cancer-free!”

And my heart filled with joy for him. I don’t even know him, really. He’s just a guy who delivers our pizza once in a while. But right then, at that moment, I don’t know that there could be any better news for anyone to hear and my heart felt so full.

I choked up as I took the pizza inside and told Teacher Man what I had heard. Teacher Man – who at that moment was wearing his breast cancer awareness tie in honor of his mom, who passed away from cancer five years ago tomorrow – ran outside to congratulate him as well. 

What a special moment between strangers. And I could feel my mother-in-law’s presence in the house. 

Finally, I sat down on the couch, turned on the Olympic coverage, and saw the most beautiful story about Lindsey Vonn and her grandparents – especially her Grandpa Don, who recently passed away. NBC captured the last moments of time she spent with him before he died a few weeks later, and the sheer joy and love on his face when he talked about his granddaughter was breathtaking.

Which is why I’m sitting on the couch, tears in my eyes, thinking of my own sets of grandparents and the special relationships I had with each. Basically I’m a hot emotional mess tonight internally but my faith in humanity has been restored, at least a little bit tonight, thinking of the everyday laughs I shared with Joe, our pizza delivery guy who received an amazing new lease on life and shared his happiness with us, and remembering the unconditional love and support I received from my grandparents. 

None of it seems at all related and yet it all makes some sort of crazy sense to me tonight.

And so I had to share it all with you in the hopes that you could feel some of what I’m feeling tonight.

XOXO – Lara